


Give it to you

by bessmertny



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M, dom!cassian, sub!nesta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-20 05:51:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9478415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bessmertny/pseuds/bessmertny
Summary: Nesta needs to give up control, to just feel her emotions without the weight of her walls pushing down on her; gladly for her, Cassian is there to help.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Some huge thanks at saessenach and acowar on tumblr for betaing and for helping with this ❤  
> Ok, so i tried to made the Illyrian language using latin, so :   
> Ego te amo= I love you  
> Mea amata Nesta= My beloved Nesta  
> I hope you'll like it!

“Well,” Nesta clicks her tongue, her posture rigid, a Queen upon her throne “Devlon, if you insist on being a thorn in our side, I shall treat you as one.” she doesn’t move, there’s not even a trace of what’s about to come as ice coats Devlon legs and quickly moves up to his torso.

Cassian sees the impressed look on Amren’s face at Nesta’s boldness and he can hear the excited giggles of the little Illyrian girls trying to overhear this conversation from outside the tent.

“ _Bitch_ ,” Devlon mutters and Cassian wants to move, to place his fist in Devlon’s face, but he doesn’t; he waits, knowing that his mate needs to end this by herself.

There will always be time for Cassian to kick Devlon’s ass, but not now.

“So, the Illyrian females will train today, right?” Nesta asks, but it’s not a question, only a way to further humiliate her opponent.

Devlon doesn’t answer right away but Cassian can smell his growing fear as he tries to move his limbs and fails.

“Yes, yes, they can train. Now free me.” he answers and Nesta smiles, a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Do you really need to be freed by a made bitch like me, Devlon? I would have expected better from you.” she says, and looks at Cassian and he can see the doubt in her eyes, even if it’s only for a second.

She rises from the chair and walks away slowly, her back straight and her chin high as she takes Cassian’s hand.

He move his thumb on the soft skin of her hand and she leans into him, breathing him in and he notices, as they walk out of the tent, how her posture relaxes against him, her head resting on his shoulder and he kisses her head, her hair shining with the luminous light of the moon.

“Cassian?” Lucien calls, and it’s like the last seconds never happened: Nesta’s back is ramrod straight again, the hold on Cassian’s hand tightens, and even as tired as she is, every muscle in her body tensed.

Lucien and Nesta look at each other- there’s no more hostility between them, not like the first days when he and Elain came in the camp to organize the strategies, but Nesta still doesn’t trust him fully, still feels the need to protect her sister.

‘’Yes, redhead?” Cassian tries as best as he can to ease the tension, and at least Lucien seems to relax a bit.

“I have news from Tarquin. I gave them to Rhys, and he should talk about it with you tomorrow and I thought that you- _both of you_ , should know.”

Nesta nods and she moves closer to Cassian, just a fraction, a movement he notices only because he notices _everything_ when it comes to Nesta and says “Thank you, Lucien.”

Her voice isn’t soft or nice, but it’s stern and sincere.

Lucien looks surprised but shrugs in response, maybe too scared to break the moment with a wrong word.

As Lucien moves away Cassian holds Nesta in his arms, kissing her temple and then her forehead and she closes her eyes; he can feel them, all the emotions threatening to eat her up, can feel how she holds tightly to her control, trying to rein herself in, to not show too much.

“How about we go home, sweetheart?” he asks.

Their Cabin isn’t so far away from the camps and he would rather fly early in the morning than have to stay in the Camp at all hours and- and he doesn’t want Nesta to sleep on the ground.

She nods and whispers “Winnow.” and Cassian prepares himself for that strange sensation, like diving into complete oblivion.

Nesta holds him so tightly her knuckles turn white, like she’s so afraid to lose him in that void that she holds onto him with everything she has.

It takes a handful of heartbeats and they’re home, but Nesta’s hands are not moving, they don’t ease their grasp on him so he takes them in his, kissing her fingers, her palm, moving his hands to entwine their fingers together.

She moves on her tiptoes to kiss him and he draws their joined hands to his chest and she moves, making him walk backwards toward their bedroom.

When Cassian’s legs hit the bed he looks at her, at the raw need in her eyes, at the kissed red of her lips and he asks _“What do you need, sweetheart?”_

Nesta looks at him, trying to answer him.

What does she need?

“You.” she answers, and that’s the truth, he’s- he’s everything, the only one who can make the storms within her quiet, the only one who can make her feel calm, at peace, with no need to hide or rage or scream or leash herself.

“But you already have me, love.” he answers with a grin and she can see the joy dancing in his eyes.

She holds his face in her hands, completely engulfed by those emotions that she can’t seem to control “I want you, I want to feel you. _You and only you_.” she says, and she knows, she knows he understands from the way he looks at her, she knows he can see it.

_I want_ -, she tries to say, to shout down their bond, and he lifts her up, gently placing her on their bed, waiting for her to speak, his hands tracing soothing circles on her lower back.

She wants- she wants to give up control for once in her life, to smash her walls and see them crumble, she wants to just feel, she _needs it_ -

But she doesn’t know _how_ , she doesn’t know how to give up something she spent years-her whole life- building, but she also knows that if she gives up her control and gives it _to him_ , to Cassian, he would- he would know what it means, for her. He would know.

Cassian moves closer until their faces are not even an inch apart, and he knows, he understood, heard her shouting down on their thread made of fire and she wants, wants, wants- but she feels his tongue above her lower lip, tracing it slowly, teasingly and Nesta breathes in sharply as his hands move to her thighs, up and down and then move to unbuckle her fighting leathers and he does it slowly, like he is in complete control of the situation and that- it thrills her, it makes a shiver run up her spine that he knows exactly what to do for her, _to her_ , without her voicing it.

“I can take care of you,” he says, his voice low, a rumble in his chest. “but we have some talking to do, sweetheart.” he kisses her again, and opens the first part of her leathers “I will never do something you don’t want and if you tell me to stop, I will do so immediately.” he breathes her in and she notices how steady his movements are, even as his hands shake.

“I would never, ever hurt you, Nesta. I couldn’t live with myself.” he says, and she hears the emotion in his voice, like only the thought of hurting her makes him feel sick.

“I know.” and she believes in every word she says, because she knows, knows this selfless, hard-headed male like the back of her hand and she knows he will not hurt her, she knows it like she knows that he will always try to protect her, even from herself.

He removes her gear and she thinks, for a second, that she should be able to feel the cold but her skin is burning under his touch, as he moves is hands to cup her breasts, his thumbs moving over their raised peak and she moans, gripping his wrists to prevent his hands from moving as she falls on the bed.

He looks at her and then at her hands “Another thing, love. I’ll take control,” he moves his hands away as he speaks, and Nesta starts to protest, but he slowly removes her pants, kissing her navel, his tongue grazing her skin above her hipbone “so you’ll do as I say, or face the consequences.”

Nesta raises herself up a bit to look at him, and the view of his face between her legs makes it hard for her to speak.

“Such as?” she asks, not even trying to hide the challenge in her tone or the way her breath comes in quick gasps.

He smirks and removes her underwear faster than she can blink and his tongue is on her with a slow, sinful lick that has her head rolling back on the pillow and her hands grasping the sheets.

She feels his finger on her, where his tongue was, circling her entrance, rubbing on her sex and her hips snap up, trying to get closer, only to be pushed on the bed by his other hand.

Cassian leaves a trail of kisses as he moves up to her and when she sees how he licks his lips a wave of arousal washes through her, making her stomach tighten.

He kisses her jaw, the side of her face and Nesta wants to turn to kiss him, but the sound of his voice makes her stop.

“I’ll make you come, Nesta,” and as he speaks-his voice is low, firm, the voice he uses on war camps, a voice that is now one of the reasons for  the wetness pooling between her legs-he kisses the shell of her ear as his finger slides all the way inside her, slowly, making her moan and arch her back, her naked flesh against the cold of his fighting leathers, but the movement stops with the weight of his hand on her navel “I’ll make you come until your legs shake and all you can do is moan my name. And even then,” he continues, moving to face her and she can feel is hot breath on her lips, see how the black in his eyes completely devoured the hazel “you’ll _beg me_ for more.”

Nesta bites her lip, reining in the _please_ on her tongue and he smirks, because he knows the effect he has on her, he knows she needs him so much, _so much_.

His finger moves out of her, stroking the length of her sex once, twice and the sensation of it is like lightening, so sweet and powerful and she looks down, unable to stop herself but his hand moves, and Cassian lifts her face with a finger under her chin.

“Eyes on me, sweetheart. And _don’t move_.”

She nods, but can’t help the shift of her hips or the way her legs open further, giving him more space.

Cassian laughs softly, shaking his head and adds another finger, making her move even more.

“Sweetheart, you’re really no good at following directions,” he teases while his fingers pump in and out of her, making it hard for her to follow his words while she just wants to get lost in the sound of his voice “but you should learn.”

He looks in her eyes, like he’s searching for something her pride won’t let her show “Next time you move, I’ll tie your hands to the bed. Maybe that will teach you.”

Nesta doesn’t have the time to _think_ , to create a suitable reaction before she moans, right on his lips, moans like she can’t help herself and moves again, trying to get her body to move in time with his fingers.

Cassian looks at her as he gathers both her wrists in his hand, while the one between her thighs moves faster and faster and Nesta can barely breathe as she feels the cold metal slithering from his siphons around her wrists and she _comes_ , comes so hard she’s panting, her body tensing as pleasure courses through her, so intense she feels like she’s flying.

She looks up, to her wrists tied to the bedpost by a thin metal chain, rounded and large enough to let her move her hands, but tight enough so they won’t slip out.

“You like that?” he asks, his hand near her head and when she whispers “ _Yes_ ” he looks like he is about to crumble.

“Fuck”, he whispers “ _fuck._ ” he rests his face in the crook of her neck for a second, but then he goes down again, moving her legs on his shoulders to hook under his wings, his face going once again between her thighs and when his tongue touches her again she feels it a thousand times more, her body still so sensitive from the previous orgasm he gave her,.

“Cassian” she says, calls his name and she’s completely lost, he’s the only thing she can feel, the way he touches her, the warmth of his body, the weight of his palms on her breasts, she can’t think of anything else, it’s just _Cassian_ , her mate, just him.

His mouth licks and sucks, his tongue moving in the most perfect way, leaving her panting and wanting more, more of his mouth, more of his tongue, more of everything that he can give but when it moves inside of her Nesta starts shaking, chanting his name over and over again but he doesn’t speed up his movements, he continues with a slow torturous pace and when Nesta comes again she feels like she might be dying, wave after wave hitting her, engulfing her in a pleasure that seems to never end and he licks her through it, stopping only when he knows she can’t take it anymore.

Cassian lowers her legs on the bed and kisses her thighs, her stomach, trails kisses everywhere “Ego”, he says, placing a kiss under her breast, “te” another kiss, when her neck meets her shoulder, “amo” a kiss on her still open mouth.

He doesn’t speak Illyrian often, not even with the others in the camp, but when he does it makes her feel _so_ loved, because she knows his people rarely use words of affection, words of love, but when they do, they mean it.

“Please,” she says, even as her legs still shake with the aftershock of her second orgasm, “Cassian, _please_.”

“ _Please_ what, sweetheart? What are you pleading for?” he asks, his voice stern but he’s trembling and she knows, she knows the effect it has on him, she knows that hearing her beg him will make him lose the control he had till now.

“I want to hear you say it.” he whispers, stroking his thumb on her lower lip and Nesta moves her tongue to lick it and Cassian’s eyes go wide.

“I want to feel you, I want-I want you, I want you inside me, please Cassian, _please_.”

He doesn’t even breathe while she speaks and then rises himself up to remove his leathers, nearly tears them and Nesta can’t take her eyes off him, at how perfect he is, at every scar, every swirl of his tattoos and he’s so beautiful she can’t believe he’s hers.

Cassian kisses her, cradling her face in both his hands and she moans into the kiss, moans as she feels his cock moving at her entrance and once he moves in she can barely breathe.

She needs to touch him, she needs to feel him, he’s the only thing she needs.

“Cassian, Cassian, the chain, please, I want to feel you, want to touch you.”, he moves the second the words leave her mouth, breaking the chain he crafted and her hands fly to his face, caressing his cheeks, entwining in his hair.

He sets a hard, fast pace, snapping his hips against hers and it’s heaven, the sound of their bodies meeting filling the room “ _Nesta, Nesta, Nesta,_ ” he moans, “ _mea amata Nesta_.”

His thrusts become erratic, and he kisses her, between moans and gasps and whispered words and when he changes the angle of his hips, thrusting deeper, quicker, Nesta comes again, just a few seconds before he does, and they are moaning in each other’s mouths.

Even as they try to catch their breaths he keeps kissing her and takes her hands in his, massaging her wrists.

“How do you feel? Are your hands alright? Your wrists?” he asks, peppering kisses all over her face and she laughs, feeling lighter than she ever did.

“I’m fine.” she says, her voice tired but happy. He lowers his forehead on hers after kissing her nose, and she can feel how he’s still trembling.

“I think we both need a bath, love.” Cassian says and takes her in his arms; the bathtub is already full of steaming water and soft foam and he walks them both right into it.

Nesta rests her head on Cassian’s chest and looks up at him, at the smile on his face.

“I- the trust you had in me tonight, it- I hope you don’t regret it, Nesta. Because it means the world to me.” he says, not quite looking at her, as if he’s scared of her reaction.

But she kisses him, slow and loving “I love you, and I trust you and I don’t regret it. You know exactly what I need and you’re-you’re _perfect_ , Cassian.”

The smile he gives her is so sweet, so happy that she _has to_ kiss him again.

“When you begged, _Mother_ , you nearly killed me.” he says, holding her in his arms and Nesta settles between his legs, his wings open wide around them.

And Nesta never felt so at peace like she is with him, so complete, with all her emotions sitting in her heart and humming quietly in his presence.

“I know.” she says with a grin as he starts to massage her hair and she feels like she could melt under his gentle touch.

He laughs, and she can’t help but smiles at the sound.

“ _You_ ” he says and Nesta doesn’t have the time to react before Cassian’s hands move to her belly and he starts to tickle her, and she laughs and laughs and he does too, and the bathroom fills with the sound of splashing water and roaring, loving laughter.


End file.
